The week that was, 1

I wonder how long it will be before Facebook creates an app that you can use at your funeral?
I've been to enough funerals - and you probably have to - to know how often people do "video" montages to the deceased's favorite song. I just attended one where we were treated to some amazing photos from the 1960s to the tune of "Red Solo Cup." Ok. No judging. Here's a hint, though; if you'd rather not see me rise out of the casket swinging the hammer of Thor, spewing vitriol and whatever guts I have left, don't play "Red Solo Cup" at my funeral.
My funeral will certainly be a subject for an upcoming post. It's been germinating in my mind for a long time.
I'm pretty sure Facebook already has video capability, which randomly takes pictures from your years on its site to create a kind of living montage.
I thought of this because as I was looking at my own page this week (number of friends - 555 and stable) and thought - that's a pretty good summation of my week.
Sunday, we went to a church that St. Paul might have been comfortable attending, or if not comfortable, at least he would have understood it. He would have heard half of it in Greek, he would have seen pictures of himself and his Savior, and his Savior's mom in beautiful representations all around an incredibly beautiful building dedicated to Jesus.
:Our trip to St. Nicholas Greek Orthodox Church is one of the final gems in our confirmation class' Houses of Worship Monster Tour. Father Seraphim was a wonderful and apologetic host. He said it was too long to be in church, but I could have stayed all morning. After the sermon, which probably gave our kids nightmares ("there is a real demon trying to drag you off into hell at this very moment!") we heard from three teen speakers, who are competing in a Orthodox oration competition, and that was lovely. We got to line up to get antidoron bread (a bread of welcome) and I kissed a priest's hand for the first time.
Tuesday, I took a picture of a bottle of water that is "synergestically balanced" for "optimum hydration" because of its "enhanced pH." And guess what? It's "smooth and natural." I think my vision of hell would include working on an ad campaign for water. I took this picture while I was helping the two winners of Miss Pierce County and Miss Teen Pierce County prepare for their upcoming pageants in Spokane. They gave us the same presentations they would give there, and we were supposed to pepper them with questions that would rattle them. To Megan, whose platform is music education, I asked, "If you could bring any musician to the state of Washington to teach, who would it be." She said it was a good question (yay!) and then asked if her dream musician could be living or dead. I restrained myself from saying something about a decomposing composer, and said, "Living," and she said the name of some great conductor from South America. I also restrained myself from saying, "Wrong. The correct answer is Bono." I also restrained myself from asking them if they felt objectified by the pageant system. I think I showed the restraint and poise of a pageant contestant, don't you? Honestly, it was a lot of fun, and good luck to you young women.
Then we went to see Noah and played hearts all night. I mean, all night. That was a good day, a good night and a good morning, although it screwed up my health for the next day.
Finally, last night, we went to see Tommy Castro at Jazzbones with our friends Brad and Staci. First time at JBones, I'd never heard of Tommy Castro before, and had a bang up time. I think I'm actually maturing as a music lover, now that I have seen blues played in a club. I can cross that off the old bucket list. That's my excuse for not posting yesterday. I think five times a week is a good start, don't you?
Religion, movies, music, cards and beauty contestants. Who has a better life?

Creationity

Wednesday is for words, and this week's word is creationity.
Has kind of a truthiness feel to it, doesn't it?
I saw Noah tonight with some junior and senior high sheep and their shepherds, and I was mightily impressed with Darren Aronofsky's attempt at telling an old tale in a new way.
First, I don't go to the movies to test the filmmaker's theology - I go with my theology to see what the filmmaker can add. Thank you, Martin Scorcese, for the indelible image of a happy Christ dancing at the Wedding of Cana; thank you Franco Zeffirelli for casting Robert Powell, who got the timbre of his voice just right; thank you Cool Hand Luke for a modern re-telling of the Christ story.
Aronofsky got two things perfect, and neither of them had to do with the actual story of Noah and the flood.
The first story he got right was the creation. Noah told it to his family while on the ark and the movie stopped
all of its contrivances about Rock versions of Tolkien's Ents and gave us a story the way Noah probably actually told it- the same way it was told to him from his father Lamech and grandfather Methusaleh.
Along with Crowe/Noah's narration, Aronofsky did in five minutes what the rest of the film failed to do - bring the Bible to life. Can we now just stop all of the creation/evolution nonsense and just watch that happy snippet?
Done.
The other story Noah got right was (wait for it) Abraham and Sarah.
This requires some explanation, and a little spoiler.
While any casual reader of Scripture can tell you that God spoke to Noah and directed him down to the last minute detail about how and why he was building the ark, the filmmakers decided to let Noah take God's vision of a destroyed world to its logical conclusion. Since man has screwed up the earth, Noah and his family were to be the last family. That is, Noah's sons were alive in order to bury their parents, who would then be buried by their youngest brother, Japheth. Since God was sparing no expense in making sure the animals were safe - because they hadn't screwed up creation, mankind had - then Noah believed God was implying, last human out, turn off the earth.

So when his daughter-in-law turns up pregnant, he believes it's God's will to kill his new grandchildren.
As he's setting out to do this act of God's will, his wife Naameh (played wonderfully by Jennifer Connelly) tells him that if he does this "act of God," that God may forgive him, but she never will. That this is absolutely not God's will, but his deranged mania. She begs and pleads or him not to kill his grandchildren.
And I thought, "That's probably when Sarah told Abraham when he went to sacrifice their only son Isaac on the mountain. A mother is not going to let a little thing like God's will get in the way of the love for her child. It was a magical film moment.
There were other clear wins in this film, led by the look on everyone's face when they could hear the screams of those who couldn't get on the boat, knowing full well that they were the ultimate death panel for the world. That Noah turned to drink after this made absolute sense.
The fact that he referred to God as "Creator"? Big whoop. God didn't say his name until Moses, and if you're only 10 generations from The Creation and God hadn't made a covenant with you (that's Abraham) or freed your people from Egypt (that's Moses) and appeared to you in visions, then yeah, Creator is a pretty good name.
I don't know if there is a natural anesthesia that could knock out an ark-full of animals, but I thought it deserved a B+ for creativity. And the fallen angels/rock men helping? That would speed up the ETA considerably. And Origen, if no one else, probably cheered that the fallen angels got to return to God at their life's end.
In talking with regular people about this film, remember to stress that Noah got it wrong and his wife and daughter got it right - God is a God of mercy, and her children were a sign from him that this was a new beginning, not just for the animals, but for people too.
Last thing, and then I'll stop. Michael Gerson's article is an excellent read, although he disagrees with me. (Dude, Noah WAS a "brooding, misanthropic vegan.")
I also agree with everything Pastor Robin Dugall says in his blog.
Sorry I was late - had an all-night hearts party tonight.

It has been 693 days since my last confession...

One of the great joys of my life is writing, and while it seems I'm writing things every day, none of it is very permanent. So for 30 minutes each night, Monday through Friday, I'll be writing down a thought that I've had today.
Sounds amazing, doesn't it? How clever of you, Tim.
Oh yes, there will be self-deprecation! Don't you worry about that none.
Part of the reason I do this is that I seem to be wasting my time on Facebook. Don't get me wrong - I love Facebook, but if the only thing we do in our life is write down clever sentences that one or two people enjoy, what's the point?
So the subject of these nightly rantings will be various and sundry. I'm spit balling this, but maybe I can divide my nights into the variety of things going on in my life:
Monday Media  I love movies, and am at the beginning of watching 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die, and boy do I have some doozies to talk about.
Tuesday Work My position is youth and young adult director/preacher/care minister at Our Savior Lutheran.
Wednesday Words If someone asks me at parties what I do, beyond what my job is, I'll say, "Failed novelist." It usually ends the conversation.
Thursday Sem  I am attending George Fox Seminary, and each week, there's always something interesting to share that can't wait for a sermon.
Friday Weekly Examen. The week in review, Examen style.
So that's a little about me.
So this being Monday, we should probably talk about media, and this week's hot topic is Noah - what's a Christian to do.
If we've learned anything from the monastery system (which I'll be talking about at the Equip church history class this Saturday!) (plug!), it's that a Christian worth his weight in holy water should never be afraid to engage the world. It's absolutely fine to retreat from the world for a time, but the best ones didn't make it permanent.
We have an opportunity as a youth group to see three "religious" movies this week for our spring break all-nighter: Son of God, God is Not Dead and Noah. The first two are made by Christians, for the encouragement of Christians. I don't have to see Son of God, because I already saw a chunk of it during The Bible mini-series last year, financed by Mark Burnett and his wife/Virgin Mary, Roma Downey. I saw the trailer for God is Not Dead, and recognized immediately its source material, one of those chain emails that never go away about a lone Christian kid up against an Atheistic professor and the rest of the class. I don't think it actually ends with an egg falling on the professor's foot, like in the email, but it's probably not far off. (quick sidenote - the theme of Robert Altman's The Player is that you can take literally any stupid news story, News of the Weird, radio program and turn it into a hit movie. But a chain letter?) You know who made God is Not Dead? Someone obsessed/impressed with the buzzword of Christendom: Apologetics. If I were a teenaged Christian boy trying to impress a smart Christian girl, I would tell her I'm into Apologetics (and I would say it with a capital A). It means you're Christian - but smart. It means you're Christian - and can win an argument. It means you're Christian - and pretentious.
So we're going to see Noah, because if you want to write about sharks, it's better to do it in a shark-proof cage in the Pacific Ocean than from Iowa.
I would rather raise a jr/sr high student who can watch how Hollywood mangles a Bible story than to have his thoughts about his comfortable Christian life confirmed by fellow Pharisees.
And my 30 minutes are up. See you at the movies, 6 pm Wednesday.