After 8 years in elementary, four years in high school and three years for post-bachelor work, I think I can speak to the quality of the Lutheran avenues of learning. I would not be the human being I am today without my Lutheran education, and am a strong proponent of such.
That being said, here are the holes that I see:
1) Greek mythology. I don't know why, but in the 14 years I attended Lutheran educational facilities, I don't remember "Poseidon" ever being mentioned, unless you count Danny Trevino in 4th grade telling me about how McHale was in The Poseidon Adventure. Same with Zeus, Narcissus, Perseus and the rest. Maybe our teachers thought they were competition for the one true living God, but I hate it that I have to ask my wife about the Minotaur.
2) The Pope is the Anti-Christ. I'm no friend of Michelle Bachmann, having never met her, but in her shortened run for the White House, she was pilloried in more than one national publication for belonging to a church who believed the Pope was the Anti-Christ.
My first thought was, "Oh my gosh, we're still teaching that aren't we?" I remember Oscar Albers, our 8th grade confirmation teacher looking uncomfortable when we asked about the Anti-Christ, and he said, "All signs point to the Pope." Never mind the spiritual implication of that, what about the athletic ramifications? Our basketball games against Bishop Dwenger and Bishop Luers (Fort Wayne's two Catholic high schools) became that much more interesting. I mean, we had the power of God, which was good and all, but here these guys had the power of The Beast behind them! Every touchdown, every wrestling match, each tennis ball hit was fraught with spiritual peril. I mean, what would tip the balance? Would it be a Lutheran high school track meet beating their Catholic counterpart that would reveal the Man of Lawlessness (2 Thess. 2:3)
Sen. Bachmann was actually asked about it during a debate, and she denied belonging to a church that believed that (70 million Catholic/largely Republican voters might have had something to do with that), and it's true- she resigned her membership in her church the year before.
To be fair, that church was a Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod (WELS) church, our more conservative cousin. Their doctrinal statement indeed states that the revelation of the pope being the Anti-Christ is not theirs - it says so in Scripture.
So there it is.
Fun fact: 1 John 2 says there are many anti-Christs, along with the Big Kahuna; so anyone who is against Christ, is quite literally an anti-Christ. But as for the Capital A Anti-Christ, that one is a little harder to come by.
Have popes been anti-Christs? Of course. In fact, three of the 10 worst lived during Luther's time. No wonder that Luther railed against the papacy, as Leo the 10th sold indulgences, Julius III promoted his adopted boy-toy to cardinal and one of the worst people in history - let alone popes - Alexander VI (one of the Borgia clan) were his spiritual fathers?
What about our Synod? Surely we wouldn't be as hidebound.
Guess again.
In my text book and on LCMS's website, it states that the office of the papacy meets all the requirements of The Capital A Anti-Christ.
But therein lies the rub. The LCMS site explains it a little better:
Concerning the historical identity of the Antichrist, we affirm the Lutheran Confessions' identification of the Antichrist with the office of the papacy whose official claims continue to correspond to the Scriptural marks listed above. It is important, however, that we observe the distinction which the Lutheran Confessors made between the office of the pope (papacy) and the individual men who fill that office. The latter could be Christians themselves. We do not presume to judge any person's heart. Also, we acknowledge the possibility that the historical form of the Antichrist cold (sic) change.
Two things on that:
1) So long to your dream of ever seeing a Lutheran sworn into the Oval Office. As long as that little paragraph is on our website, ham-fisted journalists are going to find it; they won't bother making the distinction between "Pope" and "office of the papacy" as having the mark of The Beast.
2) This is a bit of ridiculousness. Saying that the office of the papacy corresponds with the marks of the Anti-Christ (which I don't believe it does) makes about as much sense as saying your son's date looks like a hamster: even if it's true, why point it out? The downside of proclaiming this as part of our doctrine far outweighs the upside Lutherans seem to need to be right at all costs.
For my last two live-streamed video conferences with my fellow seminarians, I strategically placed my Pope John Paul II calendar behind me for full viewing pleasure. It's not exactly letting my freak flag fly, but I hope it leads to a dialogue about how we should be a lot more concerned with little a anti-Christs than whether Pope Benedict smells like sulfur.
